Epiphany...

An idle mind is the Devil's play ground and I have to admit that is true. Tonight I was bored out of my mind! Just me, the internet, space and plenty of opportunity. So I went and looked up Lil Bit's father on the net and found his various pages on different social networking sites and I realized that I have arrive to destination indifference.

I would say there was a time when I would cry just to see his pictures and wonder what was it in him to do the things that he did and to treat our child in the manner that he has treated her thus far. As time went one when I saw the pictures of him with his other children I would literally feel physically sick, then my feelings would roll over into sheer anger and resentment because he was not the father to our daughter that he is to them.

Tonight when I saw his pictures I felt nothing and it brought me to the realization that I feel that way in regards to a few people that I have dated in my past that I still have ties with. I don't care any more. I am indifferent and I really feel as though I have come to this place in my life where I can let it all go and not look back. I feel as though I am really ready to move on into something new with some one new, whom ever that may be...only God knows that.

Anyway, I can say that at this point I truly feel free. I feel as though I have grown to a point as a person where I can let go and walk away from people and feelings that do nothing but waste my valuable time. To the past, the inconsistent, irresponsible, unreliable, indecisive, the immature and the game players; I bid you adieu.

To the mature, real, serious, truthful, consistent, responsible and reliable (among other things), welcome. :)