Lascivious...

Tech told me his friend asked him to describe me in one word and he said, "lascivious". Lascivious? Really? NOT.NOT and NOT. He needs to get his hormones and mentals in check because I am not lewd nor am I lustful. I am real and I can't help that I say what is on my mind at any given moment. Lascivious my ass...

Anyway that is not what I really wanted to write about, I said something about it in attempts to be a sarcastic smart ass. I really wanted to write about my day and stuff that happens in the office that really gets underneath my skin. For instance, this afternoon I got on the elevator with two women and a man; they apparently knew each other as they began to exchange greetings and small talk. Well the guy got lucky because we had gotten to his floor, the two remained women standing there in awkward silence. You can hear them searching their brains for conversation to have.

Just as the elevator stopped on Lady 1's floor Lady 2 suddenly asks the other has she seen some movie called, Red. At this point I was irritated with these heffas. Why? Because the elevator stopped on Lady 1's floor just as Lady 2 struck up conversation so Lady 1 proceeds to hold the elevator doors to carry on a meaningless and some what forced conversation. So not only did the heffas subject me to this mess they were holding me up.

Once Lady 1 noticed I was getting antsy she finally got her ass out the way so we could go. Picture this... as the elevator doors close slowly Lady 2 turns to me and smiles as if she is about to torture me with meaningless, endless small talk. But glory be to GOD! It was my turn to get off. I turned to a disappointed looking Lady 2, wished her a good day and got the hell out of dodge. Reason #1 why I hate riding elevators with others. Unless I know you and have a good rapport with you don't say anything more than hello and have a nice day.

Even though the possibility of mess like this happing is high I am never really prepared for it and I don't even know why. I should be prepared for such things or maybe in certain instances I should think WWRD (What Would Rashad Do), I wonder if I carried that with me I can react more appropriately and effectively in these situations. Hmmmm that is something to consider. With that I am going to get my "lascivious" ass off of here and possibly go find some "lascivious" things to do. Night all! *mumbling lascivious...nigga what?!*

Wine...

Wine is such a splendid thing to have after a long and hard day. It is also a good tool for lowering inhibitions and saying or writing the things that need to be written in a blog entry. LOL! I just needed a little boost to help me to stop procrastinating on writing this; not because deep down inside I know what I am about to write is hog wash or using it as a defense mechanism it is because what I am about to write for the most part is true. Some times writing a truth out is the same thing as saying it out loud; the act of writing/speaking the truth makes it real and you can't ignore the things that are real. Now can I?

Anyway, A few months ago I had hit an ex up just to see how he was doing and I revealed in that conversation that I almost got married this past summer but had to let the relationship go. Granted he did not know the ins and outs of my relationship with this man but as always his ass felt the need to psychoanalyze me (I hate when he does that) and basically told me to admit that I like being alone. Ok, well yes there is a very large part of me that likes being alone and has no issue with it. There is a part of me that for some reason chooses to be alone opposed to take a risk and endure what ever comes with a romantic relationship or getting into a romantic relationship.

In looking at my track record over the last few years I have decided to stop trying (dating, romancing, relationships etc;) all together. For the most part I can say I have been put Love out on the streets and this time I am turning off the open sign, boarding up the windows and putting the closed sign on the door. Granted those of you who know that I have a lot going on and I have recently gone through a traumatic and painful experience the past month may say, don't throw the baby out with the bath water or don't give up so easily but I am here to say I am done.

I for one have never been cut out for dating and a person can only take so much of crazy, indecisive, selfish,immature, want you but not ready and don't know what they wants flowing in and out of my life. I don't have the energy for it any more especially when my time and energy is needed else where. I would say just give me some and go home but at this point I don't even want that.

I always felt that it would take a person who was persistent, strategic and patient to sneak up on me and sweep me off my feet...I don't think just a sophisticated man exists...or is up for the challenge...especially to handle me. ;-) LOL! Hey what can I say? I am more than a handful at times.

Ok, enough of this love stuff. It is officially out of my mind space. Can I say I LOVE iTunes? My friend gave me a Trey Songz mixed tape CD, my favorite CD! It is so sexy, however it was not to sexy when the CD got scratched, began to fade and skipped horribly. I cried ya hear, cried when I could not to get it to play right. I asked my friend if he could bring me another one, he came into the office to visit me today and guess what? Yeah that azz forgot my CD (still love him though). Since I listen to my iPod in the car I figured I would just see what would happen if I uploaded the CD to iTunes and loaded it onto my iPod. Eureka!!!!!! It plays nicely, crystal clear no skips. *drawing up a sign and pulling back my weave and screaming Trigger he's back* I am going to be int he car GETTIN IT tomorrow! LOL! Night folks!