Usually in a new situation when I first meet/start talking to/dating some one I find that I easily become the aggressive one in the situation and I find that I am the one initiating the next steps in what ever the situation is. In a few entries back I wrote about Tech and how he was sent to Germany days before we were supposed to have gone out on our first date.
Tech leaving made me fall back a little bit after all he was going to be in Europe and Europeans are a little bit more laxed and in some ways less conservative than Americans so I could imagine how much fun he was going to be over there having (girls, girls, girls, girls) so I decided to leave the pace up to him and just chill. If he was interested in talking to me cool if not, cool.
So apparently I have an aggressive mentor and friend. My friend, Rani, had been pushing me to get Skype so he and I could speak to each other but I was like nawww, he didn't mention it nor ask so I am not getting it. My mentor had suggested that at first I go to Germany and visit him and now that he is in England for the duration of his assignment she has suggested a trip to England. Hmmmm, no for so many reasons. Not that I wouldn't want to go as I like the idea of being only a 3 hour drive away from France, and a 1 hour flight away from Germany, but going over seas is very low on a long list of priorities right now. However, I have been treading light around the office in order to avoid accidentally walking into an over seas assignment to support Global HR in England. *looks from side to side*
Anyway, as he got settled into living in England he did ask when I was coming out there to see him and I had to look around for wondering if he had hidden cameras in the office or if he was monitoring my same time conversations *looks from side to side*. Yesterday as I was in the midst of my bi weekly FB teasing and harassing him he finally asked me when was I going to get Skype. I told him that I'd down load it and we scheduled a time to talk.
Ok, first off Skype is cool. I like it. We were on for over 3 hours last night and had the best conversation (I love talking to him). It felt so good to see him and hear his voice. One thing I found a little surprising was that he said he missed me and I could tell he was really sincere in that sentiment. I say that is surprising because we did not have a lot of time with each other. All of our interactions were more so the few times we would see and speak to each other at work. I guess one never knows the impact that they make on a person in such little time.
Well anyway he said that he felt bad for having to leave so suddenly before we could even go out, though I know it was not his fault, he will be making it up to me when he gets back. >:-)
Sunday, May 23, 2010
Thursday, May 20, 2010
Picking It back Up...
First off let me just say I am not making any promises and for the most part I am going to try to blog more. When I first started this blog my life was very unsettled; I had just gave up my apartment (my independence too in away), lost and obtained a new job and had relationship issues like no one would not believe. Not to say I have not had relationship issues over the past two years that I have been laying words on this blog but they just were that significant to me to warrant writing about in depth.
Well, I can't say for certain that the person (AB) that I wrote about in the beginning of this blog was real significant to me either. I supposed to an extent I was going through so much at that time it was nice to have someone there to be a comfort and a constant in a time of uncertainty and an attempt at reestablishment. As time went one I realized it was not true and real like I thought it was. Eventually I rolled up on I don't care and let it go all together. I know I did not blog about the most recent of my exes but once again it was nothing real significant in the grand scheme of things. In the end I could not wait for him to mature and miraculously gain the 300 + brain cells that he needed in order for us to have an even and balanced relationship. None the less any one I have ever dated I wish them all the best and happiness... I'm too old to have ill will towards others.
I have come to notice that the more time goes on the list of the things that don't phase me or that I really don't care about gets longer and longer. I often wonder if that comes with getting older and having experienced different things in life? Or, is it when you are exposed to the situations, similar personalities and events that after a while it gets boring and you are just ready to see what is beyond it? Who really knows all I know is there is plenty I used to care about that I just don't care about any more.
As I approach my 33rd birthday (I can say my age because I don't look it. WOOT!) I would say I am starting to reevaluate my life but I am not...what is the point of reevaluating life year after year just to come to the same conclusions and do nothing about it? So I am going to just have as much fun this year as I possibly can, travel as much as my bank account will allow for me to, raise my babes, build my career, work on building my business and enjoy my friend and family to the fullest. Hmmm all that sounds so delightful to me.
Well, I can't say for certain that the person (AB) that I wrote about in the beginning of this blog was real significant to me either. I supposed to an extent I was going through so much at that time it was nice to have someone there to be a comfort and a constant in a time of uncertainty and an attempt at reestablishment. As time went one I realized it was not true and real like I thought it was. Eventually I rolled up on I don't care and let it go all together. I know I did not blog about the most recent of my exes but once again it was nothing real significant in the grand scheme of things. In the end I could not wait for him to mature and miraculously gain the 300 + brain cells that he needed in order for us to have an even and balanced relationship. None the less any one I have ever dated I wish them all the best and happiness... I'm too old to have ill will towards others.
I have come to notice that the more time goes on the list of the things that don't phase me or that I really don't care about gets longer and longer. I often wonder if that comes with getting older and having experienced different things in life? Or, is it when you are exposed to the situations, similar personalities and events that after a while it gets boring and you are just ready to see what is beyond it? Who really knows all I know is there is plenty I used to care about that I just don't care about any more.
As I approach my 33rd birthday (I can say my age because I don't look it. WOOT!) I would say I am starting to reevaluate my life but I am not...what is the point of reevaluating life year after year just to come to the same conclusions and do nothing about it? So I am going to just have as much fun this year as I possibly can, travel as much as my bank account will allow for me to, raise my babes, build my career, work on building my business and enjoy my friend and family to the fullest. Hmmm all that sounds so delightful to me.
Thrown Under The Bus
One of my Face book friends posed this question to every one for the day, If one of your co workers threw you under the bus what would you do? How would you handle it?
I found it very ironic that he would ask that question today because two of my co workers threw me under the bus on Tuesday. See part of my job is to confirm the start of employees once they have arrived for their first day of employment. Once I am notified by the recruiter and/or hiring manager of this occurrence I do what I need to do.
A few weeks ago things went a little differently. I used to speak to one of my recruiters on the phone regularly and in conversation he would mention things that would need to be taken care of and things that were coming up that I needed to prepare for. In this particular conversation I specifically asked about the status of two candidates because I had not heard anything and he said, "The group usually confirms their starts late. If I get the notification late then I will confirm them for you. No problem." I get in the next morning and see an email from said recruiter that I needed to confirm these people and when I went to go do such they weren't in the system to be confirmed. So during our next conversation after inquiring he said, "I already confirmed them, you got scared didn't you?".
So now it comes down to a week later, these people apparently weren't confirmed and the group is in an uproar and we are trying to scramble around to make sure these folks get paid tomorrow. So in the mix of these two begin to complain about how their people are not getting confirmed etc. My problem with this is 1) nothing was stated or said about the process and it would be professional courtesy to mention it and work out a way for the process to move smoothly, 2) If you said you were going to do it, confirmed you did it when you didn't, that is an issue and I am sitting here feeling set up and 3) If I have to chase you down just to get you to confirm your employees' start and if employee confirmations have become so problematic that your own managers bypass you and come to me then the problem is you, yet you want to complain about me.
In the end this resulted in two conversations with my supervisor and a removal of confirmation duties for these two which at this point I simply don't care. My response to it all? Sent and email stating that any requests and or informing me of tasks that they are to perform themselves in lieu of me are to come via email and email only. yes, I am feeling rather pissed and I feel some resentment begin to set in but what else can I do? How would you handle an issue such as this?
I found it very ironic that he would ask that question today because two of my co workers threw me under the bus on Tuesday. See part of my job is to confirm the start of employees once they have arrived for their first day of employment. Once I am notified by the recruiter and/or hiring manager of this occurrence I do what I need to do.
A few weeks ago things went a little differently. I used to speak to one of my recruiters on the phone regularly and in conversation he would mention things that would need to be taken care of and things that were coming up that I needed to prepare for. In this particular conversation I specifically asked about the status of two candidates because I had not heard anything and he said, "The group usually confirms their starts late. If I get the notification late then I will confirm them for you. No problem." I get in the next morning and see an email from said recruiter that I needed to confirm these people and when I went to go do such they weren't in the system to be confirmed. So during our next conversation after inquiring he said, "I already confirmed them, you got scared didn't you?".
So now it comes down to a week later, these people apparently weren't confirmed and the group is in an uproar and we are trying to scramble around to make sure these folks get paid tomorrow. So in the mix of these two begin to complain about how their people are not getting confirmed etc. My problem with this is 1) nothing was stated or said about the process and it would be professional courtesy to mention it and work out a way for the process to move smoothly, 2) If you said you were going to do it, confirmed you did it when you didn't, that is an issue and I am sitting here feeling set up and 3) If I have to chase you down just to get you to confirm your employees' start and if employee confirmations have become so problematic that your own managers bypass you and come to me then the problem is you, yet you want to complain about me.
In the end this resulted in two conversations with my supervisor and a removal of confirmation duties for these two which at this point I simply don't care. My response to it all? Sent and email stating that any requests and or informing me of tasks that they are to perform themselves in lieu of me are to come via email and email only. yes, I am feeling rather pissed and I feel some resentment begin to set in but what else can I do? How would you handle an issue such as this?
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
Helping vs. Enabling
So this issues has been one of the many things that have been annoying me over the last few days.
As I wrote in this here blog two years ago I had to move in with my Dad and his witch *ahem* I mean wife until I got myself together after having been laid off from my job.
Fast forward two years and I finally took care of the things that were preventing me from moving (with some assistance from Dad, my savings and my 401K). So now that I am preparing to secure my place and plan my departure he wants to throw a monkey wrench in my plans, my little sister.
A little back ground...lil sister; went to school for massage therapy, got licensed, hopped from spa to spa, did not bring in much income, spends frivolously, going to school full time with no and I mean NO steady job and no inclination to even get a part time. All of the latter are reasons why I was incredulous when my father said that he thought we were getting a place together. No, no and no.
So he knows someone who used to rent houses and he said that he would look in to see if he could rent us a house large enough for me, her and my three beautiful children. When I hear this all I see is $$$$$ and even though he claims he is going to subsidize her rent, like he does her car note, insurance and gives her money because she has no job. I am still seeing this $$$$$ and feeling increasingly uncomfortable with the whole idea.
I mean damn it is bad enough I struggle taking care of me and my children but I don't want to be stuck with footing the bill for a 26 almost 27 year old adult. It is entirely to much of a risk that quite frankly I don't want to nor feel comfortable taking on. Secondly, I have lived in a home within the last two years with approximately 3-9 people (yes the house is rather large) and quite frankly I want my own space. Selfish as it may be I want my own privacy (as much as one can get with kids living in the home)and I don't want to feel as though I have to consistently police the bad habits of others and who is brought into the house. Plus after a while we don't get along and if I am going to be living with someone that I am going to fight with, then it is going to be someone of the opposite sex that I can have make up sex with at the end of the argument. I so wish I could express these sentiments (well not that last sentiment. LOL) but it is going to spark a serious flame with my Dad, with him accusing me of giving up on her and insisting that he is going to help her no matter what.
Granted, I love my sister but in this respect she needs to grow the fuck up and he needs to let her. I'm tired of the I go to school full time excuse. Shit I went to school full time and worked before there was such a thing as online classes with children in tow and I managed to do what I needed to do for me and the children.Even in times when I had no job I knew what to do and where to go in order to make sure my most essential bills ie; house, car, food and utilities were taken care of. I just want to get on the roof and scream "STOP ENABLING HERRRRRRRRRRR!"
I have no clue what to say or what to do right now... I take that back. I know what I am going to do, I am going to move forth with my plans accordingly; this was just a straight rant.
As I wrote in this here blog two years ago I had to move in with my Dad and his witch *ahem* I mean wife until I got myself together after having been laid off from my job.
Fast forward two years and I finally took care of the things that were preventing me from moving (with some assistance from Dad, my savings and my 401K). So now that I am preparing to secure my place and plan my departure he wants to throw a monkey wrench in my plans, my little sister.
A little back ground...lil sister; went to school for massage therapy, got licensed, hopped from spa to spa, did not bring in much income, spends frivolously, going to school full time with no and I mean NO steady job and no inclination to even get a part time. All of the latter are reasons why I was incredulous when my father said that he thought we were getting a place together. No, no and no.
So he knows someone who used to rent houses and he said that he would look in to see if he could rent us a house large enough for me, her and my three beautiful children. When I hear this all I see is $$$$$ and even though he claims he is going to subsidize her rent, like he does her car note, insurance and gives her money because she has no job. I am still seeing this $$$$$ and feeling increasingly uncomfortable with the whole idea.
I mean damn it is bad enough I struggle taking care of me and my children but I don't want to be stuck with footing the bill for a 26 almost 27 year old adult. It is entirely to much of a risk that quite frankly I don't want to nor feel comfortable taking on. Secondly, I have lived in a home within the last two years with approximately 3-9 people (yes the house is rather large) and quite frankly I want my own space. Selfish as it may be I want my own privacy (as much as one can get with kids living in the home)and I don't want to feel as though I have to consistently police the bad habits of others and who is brought into the house. Plus after a while we don't get along and if I am going to be living with someone that I am going to fight with, then it is going to be someone of the opposite sex that I can have make up sex with at the end of the argument. I so wish I could express these sentiments (well not that last sentiment. LOL) but it is going to spark a serious flame with my Dad, with him accusing me of giving up on her and insisting that he is going to help her no matter what.
Granted, I love my sister but in this respect she needs to grow the fuck up and he needs to let her. I'm tired of the I go to school full time excuse. Shit I went to school full time and worked before there was such a thing as online classes with children in tow and I managed to do what I needed to do for me and the children.Even in times when I had no job I knew what to do and where to go in order to make sure my most essential bills ie; house, car, food and utilities were taken care of. I just want to get on the roof and scream "STOP ENABLING HERRRRRRRRRRR!"
I have no clue what to say or what to do right now... I take that back. I know what I am going to do, I am going to move forth with my plans accordingly; this was just a straight rant.
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