Just Some Thoughts...

First, can I just say I hate blogging at work? I feel as though I have to restrain my self when writing at work. I can't do to much cussing and I can't say what I really feel about my job on my worst days; it just sucks.

Anyway...

Over the last few weeks I have been thinking about relationships and this whole finding the "one" and your "soul mate" type thought process and my experience over the many years I have spent dating has lead me to this belief; there is no such thing. Yes, there are a small number of people that one meets that they just click with and it feels like they have known each other for along time but seriously, is that really the foundation for a long lasting relationship? In away you are literally going into it with your subconscious mind. I am not going to say this applies to every one because everyone is different and being different is what is beautiful about people in general, but for the most part it directly applies to me.

So at this point of my life I figured the answer for me was to be with some one that fulfills all of my major needs and some of my wants, I can stand his flaws, he can stand my flaws and just grow to love this person over time. You know, consciously find things about him that I will click with and move on from there. I suppose I got something out of having dated a lot of ABBs, Lucifers and Prodigals.

Once you meet some one what measure do you use to know if they are a keeper? Do you have a physical or mental check list that you keep? Or, do you go with the flow of things until they start throwing things you would consider to be deal breakers at you?

Moving on...

I have never really been one to tell all of my business or open myself up to many people. I suppose that is why people make a lot of assumptions about me as a person because I don't let them see that inner portion of myself...bottom line I don't trust many people. Also people who know me like that know that if there is something they want to know then they need to come ask me and accept the answer that I give them. So, when people begin to ask around about me or a certain situation pertaining to me I see that, 1) evidently they don't know me like that and 2) I get a little leery of that because I begin to wonder what they want to know that much info for? Why is my personal business so valuable to you to take your time and energy to go from person to person asking and fishing for information?? I suppose there is some fun in it but I don't see it.

I know a lot of people are like who cares? But for me is stems from a much deeper place. In having grown up with an ultra, ultra nosey Granny...let me just say I LOVE her to death and will cut some one over her but she is nosey and sometimes she does medal in folks lives but it is all out of the love she has for us (I have to often remind myself of that). Yet and still as an adult it has left an impression on me and personally I like the direct approach. Anyway, the difference between my Granny and people that don't know me like that is the place that it comes from. My Granmother loves us all to death and her greatest dream is to see her family live a good and rather struggle free life; therefore if she has gets in the business and make things go the way she thinks it should to ensure that we are happy then she is going to do it (Gotta Love Her!). As for other people they just seem to like to get into your business just to have something to talk about...ok I am done with the random thoughts and must get back to the job.