Thursday, August 27, 2009

Thoughts of a Restless Mind...

My spirit is still not settled today and for some reason I can't seem to concentrate. I am tired on top of all that as well. I can't wait for this class to be over in 3 weeks then, only then will I no longer have to force myself to stay awake in the name of class work.

Ok.. on with the restless randoms...

As most of you may know or may not know I watch A & E channel on the regular. I have to say it has become one of my favorite channels over the last few years. They hooked me with the First 48 and Intervention then they blew me away with the comedy of Parking Wars and have me pleading the blood of Jesus with Paranormal State. Well they have by far out done themselves this time and in away hit home with Obsessed. They have been chronicling the lives of people with OCD and how they go about over coming the disorder. For those who know me and don't know I am boarder line OCD and though I know how to manage it sometimes it still effects me in the worst way. A few weeks ago they aired the show Hoarders... I have tried to watch it but the show makes me itch and it gives me anxiety to see the things that people continuously keep but never throw away and this is much, much more than a stack of books and old magazines. I am talking food, spoiled food, clothes garbage etc; makes me wonder how it gets that excessive.

Well this morning I opened up my drawer that was full of lotions, body sprays and all kinds of smell good one could want or have. Then I thought back to the two medium sized moving boxes of lotions, perfumes, and body sprays that currently sit in my storage container. No, that does not make me a hoarder is just lets me know that I need to do something about my isht. Plus I have not bought anything from B & B for over a year now. So the next thing I need to do is let go of what is almost empty, use what is full, request no one give me that stuff as gifts and continue to stop buying the stuff. So I started the task of eliminating my collection this morning, we will see how I do. May be I will start working on my excessive collection of shoes and my shoe buying next, NOT. LOL! Never that and just no.:)

Any way...

As mentioned above and probably in previous blog entries I will be done with my undergrad degree in three weeks. I am so counting down to when my very last grade with this institution is posted. After 14 years of trying to get this degree finished it will be done. I decided to participate in commencement in December and I will be doing acrobatics across the stage and this happiness filled performance will be complete with pyrotechnics. Every one must be sure to be careful because regalia is highly flammable. LOL!

I have been going back and forth about what to do next. I definitely know I will be trying to have some magic worked with the student loans I will be paying on for eternity and wouldn't you know I am crazy enough to go back for more and add to the enormous amount of loans that I already have?? Yeah I am going under take a masters program. I was all set to prep for law school admissions process and taking the LSAT but I had a very candid conversation with my girlfriend while in Atlanta (she's an attorney), she was telling me that in law school you have zero life. No life? Yeah apparently even with he part time program it will require being in class five nights a week and then at the law library doing home work on the weekends. I don't have that kind of support system in place for one and two I can't imagine not having time with my kids. I am so excited about having the time to do PTA and being at the boys' school alll the time. You know embarrassing them by kissing and hugging them in front of their friends. Yeah how could I not be there to do all that?

I am not counting law school out I will just be putting it down for a while and possibly go once lil bit hits high school. Until then I am working on entering a masters program for organizational management and I am going to focus on moving up out of the position I am currently in because the monotony of it has long since set in and I am getting antsy.

I said it before and I will say it again, I need a change (good change of course).

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