2008 Year End Review...

Not even going to do one. LOL! Bottom line it was a year of self discovery, learning, growing, recovery and restructuring so to speak.

Praying that 2009 will be a year of health, happiness and prosperity for every one. I am sure there are plenty of good things to come to many who have been blessed to see the New Year.

Everyone have a wonderful and Happy New Year! :)

New Years Eve, What's The Haps?

How will you all be bringing in the new year? I told Mr. Man that we could go to church and ring in the new year that way but him hanging his head down as if he feels he will burst into flames upon setting foot on the ground of the church made me think that we should figure out something else to do.

Last year I went out with my line sisters, one of my line sister's was throwing party. We had a good time and it was free. So I suppose I am looking for the same thing this year for Mr. Man and I to have a good time but with out coming up off of a whole lot of $$$$$. Especially after he said, "Baby why am I going to spend $100 + to stand around for 4 hours and look at niggas, when I can sit at home and look at you for free??"

A good point he has but he needs not stare at me for an extended period of time, I don't like folks staring at me with out saying anything; that drives me crazy.

Anyway, if there is anything good going on then please share. Thanx.

Glad It's Over...

Christmas and my surgery that is. I hope every one had a wonderful Holiday. I know just seeing the kids' faces light up made my Christmas and I finally got the Christmas present I have been praying, begging for, for the last 3 or 4 years. Happy and ecstatic I am about it and I may write extensively about it later on.

Anyway... as I had written before I was scheduled to have oral surgery the day after Christmas. I had the surgery as scheduled and it was not as bad as I made it out to be in my head. I was concerned that I was going to feel pain during the procedure but I felt nothing and heard very little. There was not much pain after either but that is thanks to good drugs... the stitches are tugging and pulling making the area that was cut starting to throb but it is all good.

I am just glad my face does not look like I have been packing nuts for the winter.

If it seems as though I am all over the place with this blog then just blame it on the drugs... blogging while doped up on pain meds... lol...

Just Some Thoughts...

Today for the first time in about six months I had an episode of road rage. I was coming off the exit ramp getting onto BW Parkway and the lady did not speed up in enough time to pass me and as the merge lane ended I ended in front of her foiling her ignorant ass plan to be an ass hole and try not to let me onto the parkway. It was all good until she went to pass me and she was mouthing some words to me and rolling her neck. At this point I turned the Kirk Franklin off, threw out the what would Jesus do and told that bitch to pull over. I wanted her to pull over. My daughter was in the back saying Mommy don't say that and my boys were back there advising the lady NOT to pull over. It was almost a mess but the pleas of my children made me calm down. I swear some times I don't know what I would do or where I would be if God did not bless me with them.

Anyway...

I am one of millions of people who are on the Face Book and what I want to know is why is there a need to request comment on every move your friend makes?

Miss. Lady and Mr. Man are now friends - add comment

Miss. Lady pushed Ole Girl down the stairs - add comment

Miss. Lady is no longer in a relationship - add comment

Miss. Lady joined the group Who Can Pee Split Pea Soup - add comment


I mean damn not every one has to comment on everything and not every one's opinion needs to be welcomed. Though I have become addicted to face book I still find the fact that every move I make is broadcasted and that people have the option to comment on it. I think I should have the option to turn that shit off or allow for comments on certain things as I see fit.

Ok moving on...

Just a teaser... love life has gotten interesting will blog about it in another month or two. *Evil laughter*...

Kids say the darnest things, my mother bought the boys a Wii and sent it via my sister. She walked into my room to deliver the game and my son says to her, "Oh I like your WEAVE!" I was incredulous that my son would out and out say that to any one. For one my sister does not have a weave and two you don't point out a 1B unless the owner of said weave mentions that it is 1B. Needless to say they almost did not get my *ahem* I mean their Wii.

Ok, I need to go hook up my *ahem* I mean their Wii.

LMAO! Just Classic!

One thing I cannot stand are lazy mofos and people who do things that are rather idiotic. In the midst of trying to prepare for the company shut down I have had to turn over my forms and procedures so the on call recruiters can do their own offers to include shipping them out. We all haveour own Fed Ex accounts but since I hit the scene they have not been using them because I do all of the shipping. So, when one of my recruiters asked me for my log in information I told her to pull her own account number and I will sit down and help her set it up. She said, "ok" and I hear nothing further until I called to talk to my recruiter on theother side of town who told me she called asking him for his Fed Ex information to use it during the shut down, telling him I di dnot want to give her mine (technically I didn't). *scrathching head*

1) Did I not tell her to pull her account number so I can take all of 2 minutes to help her set up access? and 2) they have user names and passwords for a reason, not to give to every one who feels they need it, especially whne they have their own. So I explained to him that she has her own she just needs to do what I told her to do. He said, "Oh so she is just being lazy." I was nt going to argue with him so I said, "Pretty much, yeah." Then all hell breaks loose. LOL! he then said, "She needs to get and use her own SHIT!" ROFL! Makes no sense.

I swear it grates my nerves when people act simple like that and the funny thing is if you act simple then I cannot resist the urge to pick with you and bring your ignorance and simpleness to the fore front for every one to see. Mean I know but hey every action has a reaction and consequence.

Man, him saying she needs to get her own shit was the highlight of my day. LOL!

Pulled In Different Directions...

As my time off from work draws near it seems as all hell has broken loose. Hiring managers are going crazy, recruiters are piling on the last minute work, I am trying to push everything through and my office looks like a file room exploded in it. So in the midst of my day yesterday my daughter's school calls because she was acting unlike herself with a fever to boot. I ended up leaving work early to take her to the doctor. Thinking it was something simple she could get treated for, imagine my surprise when the doctor said she had pneumonia and there will be no school for her today or tomorrow (Thank God I can work from home). I was also supposed to run a Z-Hope program for my sorority on Thursday and since my daycare fell through I can't. So last night I spent the time to purchase the additional items they needed for the program and ended up having to chuck it up to BMore to drop it all off, only to end up driving back in ice rain. When I got in last night I ended up laying it down for min.

Anyway...

I have a few things on my mind first of which, I can't stand Amazon.com right now. I get this wonderful email informing me that I have until today to take advantage of super saver shipping for free and my presents will be delivered before Christmas. I get to the website place an order and find out the reality of the situation, Super saver shipping takes 5-9 business days in transit and it could take up to 3 business days for the item to actually ship out of the warehouse; the only alternative that leaves is to upgrade shipping. Well, an upgrade puts me at a shipping cost of $42. Talk about a serious bait and switch. I mean damn do you know how many more toys and presents I can purchase with $42 that I would be wasting on shipping and handling? Some times these companies just abuse a situation, especially if it is a desperate one. What parent is not going to pay all that extra money to ensure their kids have their presents under the tree for Christmas? This is one parent that is still on the fence and may have to fight the crazy Christmas crowd to save some money.

Another pondering...

Over the last year I have received these alerts for some site called Tagged. The finally alert from an old co worker moved me to actually create a page, I figured that once I created a page I would stop getting those annoying invites. No mas. I then started to get emails from the site telling me to check my alerts, as I went in it had my profile picture. Where the sam hell the picture came from is beyond me. So it asked me to upload the pic as my profile picture and I did such thinking now will you all leave me alone??? Nope, to much like right. Since I uploaded the damn pic I have been getting emails of people clicking on my pic stating they are "Interested" WTF? I get them all through the day and night. I have gone into the site to find out where they have this nonsense of me posted and how I can take it down to make it stop.

So as I get stuff from 30 plus year old men named T-Bone, Thug Thug, Bone Thug and Straight Thug posing like they are about to rough some one up I feel myself getting irritated by it all. I have tried to figure out how to delete the account and I can't seem to find it. This is like forced membership, like MySpace in purgatory.

Ramblings

Today is officially the last day or week of my 5 week Marketing class. Woot! Woot! I am so happy that this is over. I feel like I have mental burn out, which is leading me to take the next quarter off and start back up with a blast in the Spring by taking three classes (full time course load) and then finishing up my last two classes in the summer so I can call it done and over with. Well I necessarily can't say I will be done, I will be getting a Masters preferably in Organizational Development, then I can say I DONE.

Anyway...

I am awaiting the start of my vacation. I have my plans set and my folks are ready to go out and chill with me. I have so many friends that I have not been able to hook up with in eons so it will be nice to sit back, relax, eat, drink and catch up on things. I love spending time with my girls it seems to bring a balance back to my life which basically consists of work, school, kids, church and sorors. I suppose I can throw in the complications of a person that says the right things but can't seem to match actions with his words but considering my thoughts and feelings on that and what I ultimately have decided to do about that situation I am not even going to consider it a life factor. Hey, what can I say? It is what it is.


Now, I noticed that every time I get on the phone my daughter feels the need to be up under me and want to hold conversations with me. I am looking at her like I am on the phone. The only time she seems to leave me alone is if her Dad and I are speaking other wise it is, "Mommy, Mommy MOMMY!"

Like last night I was on the phone talking to an acquaintance and this chick starts screaming at the top of her lungs. I wanted to slap her, she knows better than that. Why do they do that? This is one reason why I am anticipating a move next year because we all are in need of our own space.

Per This Conversation...

My mind is officially gone!

Me: Hey D! It's Lady, I am trying to put out your offer but I need the name of the contract in order to draft the letter and it is not located on the requisition. Call me.

Two hours later...

D: Hey Lady! What's up?

Me: I need the contract name to put out your offer.

D: Are you having one of those days? You must be having one of THOSE days. Go back, look at the email.

Me: Ugh?! What are you talking about?!

D: Go back look at the email and laugh.

Me: Ok, I got the email andddddd DAMN! It's right there! It wasn't there when I looked at it, where the hell did that come from.

D: Just laugh! Don't say nothing! Juuust laugh!

My mind is just gone... vacation come now.

Knotted Up

My neck is knotted up and it is causing a shooting pain on one side of my head, ouch. I am thinking that a full body massage would do the trick but I don't like being touched. I have conditioned myself to be touched and not feel uncomfortable with it in two situations; if I am in a relationship with some one and when I am showing affection to my children besides that don't touch me. At this point the thought of some one I don't know (or even do know) touching me like that is making me... shudder.

I don't know, I think this is one of those things that I will just have to go and do with out thinking. Yeah, I will go get it done and see how I feel... I am sitting here laughing at myself, I can get a full brazilian bikini wax with no issue but I can't stand to get a full body massage.

I need to stop belly aching about it and just go do it; massage, wax and all.

Common Sense...

Does not exist any more.

You are offered a job, your letter was sent to you via email and Fed Ex. If you fail to send in your signed acceptance letter and take your drug, would you think to show up at your "new job" on the Monday you are slated to start and still expect to get paid? Would you still expect for the benefits center to have your stuff ready to go?

You apply for a job and provide no email address, home address or zip code; if you were to be contacted for an interview or offered employment how else are we to get a hold of you for further processing or to address any issues that may come up?

If you have an alternative address and did not state that is the address you want all correspondence to go to then, why are you complaining when it ends up going to the address you provided? I mean if you provided it as the primary and only address then that is where you must want all correspondence to be sent to. Right?


If you send me an email asking me how the order of approvers should go and I tell you that it is just a paper everyone is signing it does not matter just as long as the signatures are on there and you email me back stating usually you follow the order as rendered by your process; than why in the hell did you ask ME?! Did you know you all were not supposed to be signing the form any way?

There are a growing number of people doing things such as the above. I don't know if people have gotten entirely to lazy to think, if they were absent the day common sense was given out or if they really just don't care but this is ridiculous.

I can't wait for COB Dec. 19Th that is when my vacation officially starts. Thank you JESUS!

For The First Time I Cried...

I was talking to the The Minister this evening and just explaining to him somethings that I have going on with me and with in my life (work, school, kids, preparing to buy a house etc;). In our conversation I was reflecting on how now I see why I had to go through the things I have gone through and I see how even though there have been times where I felt God was not there, he was and is. His hand has been in everything from the beginning and I am certain it will be until the very end.

As I was really telling him how good God has truly been to me and how I understand when people say they have a testimony, I began to cry. I was not crying out of sadness, it was more so because God has been so good and I am happy. I feel no pain nor sorrow but I am in a state of true peace. Yeah, I get frustrated and upset but those things or people only bother me for a second. In the end I am really, truly happy. I have not felt this level of happiness in well over 7 years.

Now that I chose to be happy, I have a much better appreciation for it.

Therapy Session

Tonight was my first of what will be many therapy sessions. I must say that I did feel a whole lot better after discussing the things that I discussed with her. It felt good to finally say a few things out loud and get them off of my chest. It was also good to pin point where the anger stemmed from and what causes me to have angry out bursts at times.

We set some pretty good goals, one being for me to start trying to mend things with my Mom. She felt it was to ambitious of her to set the goal of my mother and I being "close" and I agreed with her whole heartedly. I am not sure if it is possible to be "close" to some one who has physically, emotionally and verbally abused you for most of your life. Is it? Who knows? For now I told her I will commit to calling her once a month and we can see what happens from there as time progresses.


Aside from it being a good session I was beginning to feel a little self conscious. I noticed that when I was sitting there talking she was just writing away and my curious behind was wondering what the hell she was writing?? Was she writing something that would be significant to my healing process? When will she reveal this wonderful solution to all my problems? Was she drawing? Doodling? Or, was she writing, "this chic is straight crazy and extremely angry. Is potentially dangerous." ??

To Much Time On My Hands... What To Do?

Yesterday I received an email from the president of my fine company informing employees that we were to take a mandatory two week vacation at the end of the month in order to save money. :-I

Some extra notice would have been nice but by all means I am not mad at this at all. I mean I could use a mental break but that is entirely to much time. I am also glad they are doing this in lieu of lay offs and at the end of the vacation I still have a job to go back to. BUT, what am I to do with two weeks of no work???

What would you do if you had two paid weeks off? I need not allow for this idle mind to become the Devil's workshop.